"Bite Hard well it's a broken smile,
Breaking their hearts
And breaking their minds
Bite Hard, well it's a five ol' five,?
Your engine's alive and we ride together
We ride together
We die together"
-Franz Ferdinand

Sunday, July 8, 2012

Seaweed

I'm not allowed to eat seaweed because of fucking radiation in Japan. So, I improvised. Have currently hidden massive box of yummy seaweed packets under my bed and frequently sharing with my feline friends. What now, bechez??

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Friday, July 6, 2012

Friday, March 16, 2012

Ugh.

Having a really bad fucking day. Or week. What difference does it make. I refuse to include a question mark there for the sole purpose of not really giving a shit about who answers it, assuming that anyone would -___-
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Sunday, March 11, 2012

blah

I feel that strange sense of coldness again. No, I'm just not entirely sure what I feel. I dont FEEL anything. Things are starting to slow down, my energy is dropping, and each breath is exasperating. Anger and sadness compact and triumph over all odds while I'm left here to think... my god, I hate thinking. It merely prolongs the sickness of mental decay. And I'm sooo fucking miserable, I dont even know why. You're all probably laughing at me, too. Couldnt I at least have a plausible explanation as to why my mood swings seem to get the best of me? Give me a fucking reason to mope about while my years are slowly crumbling. I want to at least know what I'm crying about -__-
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Monday, March 5, 2012

I would really rather not have friends at this point. Each friend is a liability. A fragile piece in my unraveled and frayed thread of life. Quite frankly, a mere cause for disruption. And when it shifts, you're forced to move with it! It drags you along on its journey...its very unpleasant journey -___- I hate people.
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Tuesday, January 31, 2012

For an instant
I am of two.
An eerie enclosure
Of which time stands still.
Idle if only for a while.
Within the slip of a beat,
An unseen face,
Washover feeling of dread...
And within a glance
Merely a fleating sense
I've risked it all. And slipped.
I've slipped from reality.
Falling so deep...
Never far from this entrapment.
And yet,
The beating of a heart stands idle and constant.
The slamming,
The cracking,
The tearing of warm flesh.
A piece of me stands idle and constant.
And within that same beat
Muscles clenched,
Head spinning within a skull,
I've risen and forgotten.
Eyes set alight with humor
And passion.
For that was only a thought.
An idea burried under my skin.
Repressed
Restrained
Restricted.
Bound and controlled
Within the darkest chasms of one's being.
Held together by tortured flesh
And damaged minds.
Merely a thought.
Or so it would seem.



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Monday, January 30, 2012

I have an obsession for dead flowers.
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Friday, January 27, 2012

Man, I wasnt kidding. There ARE wolves here. I hear them at night and its the creepiest thing. O.e
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I used to want to block out the world. Clouding it with my anger-fused cacophany of music, I stiffened my ear drums with the most clamorous sounds. And for the moment, I was lost in it. I was lost in the numbing pain that encased me. Now I want to hear what it has to say. I listen for this gift of life it has to offer, and I search for the nature that will heal me. And if not heal me, then open my eyes just a little wider and show me a time where all things are worth their lot. I wait and listen for her words of guidance. And with each rustle of the trees, the cry of a single gist of wind, the creaking of water as it races through, the howling of wolves so out of place... For god's sake, the roaring traffic of the city! I hear her and cant help but hide the crinkle of a smile. Ive found her.
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Sunday, January 15, 2012

Am I melodramatic? Well, of course I am. But, really. Does my ever growing pain and endless whiney fits of torture just lull others to sleep? Im not being taken seriously. I know I am. I shouldnt have to prove myself. Im not. Not really... Am I?
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Thursday, January 12, 2012

So, I realized that names could be traced straight to my blog... Whoops.
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Hmm... I didnt pass the 1st semester Advanced Topics exam, which is composed of Agebra II and Trigonometry, basically a side credit for turd brains like me who cant pass Algebra. Which also means I failed Algebra twice. Which also implys my inability to graduate... Which also makes me feel like shit... Which foreshadows my second attempt at suicide through embarrassment and frustration... My god. Does my unhappiness just flourish in waves... cycles? I am doomed -___-

But im not seriously going to throw my self on the line... I'm just thinking...

Fml.
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Sunday, January 1, 2012

Venus de Milo

Aha my sketchbook assignment :D
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